Also, having an involved father who wants the child is very important for both you and the child. I'm not talking marriage when I say that. What I mean is support for you is good and love for the child from both parents is critical.

I don't disagree with the majority of your post, but this particular statement seems like a gross underestimation of single parent homes. Not only can single parent homes be successful, one could agrue that they have an advantage in some ways because they don't have obligations such being a souse or whatever. They can focus on being a parent (and an employee, granted) The atage goes "it takes a village to raise a child," there seems to be some truth in this...children benefit from interactions with many people. Emotional support for the parent is vital, but that support does not need to come from the paternal contributor. :-\

two parents are nice, but not NECESSARY.

VHZ I was in NO WAY criticizing single parent households. What I was talking about was having both donors wanting to be parents and their subsequent involvement. Those parents don't have to be in the same household to be caring and active in their child's life. This is important, because children emotionally can feel rejected or a void if one parent is absent in spirit.

Straight from the pharmacological information on the Plan B website, it works by:

"preventing ovulation or fertilization (by altering tubal transport of sperm and/or ova). In addition, it may inhibit implantation (by altering the endometrium). It is not effective once the process of implantation has begun."

ETA: I also think you should speak with a trusted friend or counselor (in person) regarding your situation.

When I took Plan B, the pharmacist explained it to me just like you posted.  I took it the next morning. The sooner the better.  If I remember correctly, SQ didn't take it for a couple of days.  Things were probably already in serious progress.  Obviously, they were.

I agree about speaking with a trusted friend or counselor.

VHZ, you seem to be the voice of experience. 

I wish I knew the right answer, I wish I could go back in time and not make the mistake that I had.  Oh if only...

Reading all of your posts it seems that being a mom is not for me right now.  But if I get an abortion my parents will be furious and will never forgive me.  They are catholic and totally anti abortion.  But then I realize that that is the only reason that I have for not getting an abortion is because I am afraid of everybody being mad at me.

If I keep it I'm up shit creek without a paddle, if I abort it everybody in my family will hate me.  I hate being in this situation. 

get the abortion, lie to your parents, fake a miscarriage

withholding either a dissenting opinion OR a supportive confirmation, i have to say, i admire your bluntness Adam...
can't pussyfoot around with issues like this...

rather you choose to continue with the pregnancy or discontinue the pregnancy, I'm not sure you're going to feel "good" about either one.  the fact that you are developing doubts, means that there is something in the back of your mind about it...are you conflicted by a "moral compass" or by the ideal that you may want to be a mother? 

I was going to stay out of this because I have never had children or been pregnant but I have read every comment on all of your threads.

First, I do believe it is your decision and you shouldn't be influenced by family.

I also believe it takes two to create a baby,  If you do decide to have the baby, the father should step up to the plate and help support the baby.  If he doesn't have money, he should get a second job.  You didn't create the baby on your own.  You had unprotected sex.  He was aware of that.  He must know what a condom is.  He had unprotected sex too.

You shouldn't abort because HE thinks you should.  Seems like an easy way out of child support.  He was with you when the embryo was created.

As for the comments on adoption, I wouldn't have the most beautiful niece and nephew if it wasn't for adoption.  My sister couldn't have children.  Are they bastards?  Hell no.  No child is!

The only bastards are the ones that don't believe in child support.

My niece and nephew have known they were adopted since they knew how to talk.  My niece is now 19.  When she was two or three, she used to tell me she was adopted. 

They also know that their mothers gave them up because they loved them and weren't ready or financially stable to raise a child.  Therefore they did the most unselfish act and gave them up in hopes of giving them a better life.  My sister and brother in law are not opposed to them seeking out their birth parents at any time.  They will even help. 

Unprotected sex creates babies.  Hell, protected sex does too sometimes. 

I have had friends on the pill that got pregnant, friends that used condoms that broke that got pregnant. 

If one truly wants to guarantee not getting pregnant, one should abstain from sex.  Like that is realistic! NOT!

Someone said you still have time to decide if you want to terminate this pregnancy.  You don't have to make the decision by Friday.  You still have time.

Don't make your decision based on your parents.  Don't make your decision on things you have read on this board.  Seek out an unbiased counselor and take some serious personal time to make a decision.  I noticed on your profile you stated, Do not want kids.  You have often stated it in threads as well.

If you have changed your mind..great!  There are many single moms who do just fine.  May have hard times but do well.  You have a good job.  You are not destitute.  I spend more monthly on my pets home cooking than my a**hole neighbour pays on child support for his two children.

If you do not want the baby and do not want to carry the baby, then abort.

If you want to carry the baby but don't want the baby, put it up for adoption.  You will make someone very happy.  Someone that can't have children but want a baby more than anything.

I thank the two ladies that gave up my niece and nephew.  Our family was blessed by their love of their babies.  We couldn't be more thankful.

You know we will always support your decision. 

My only disgust is that the dad is not stepping up to the plate.  He may be a great friend and you guys were FWBs, but he is the dad. 

In Canada, he is financially held responsible.  Wayward dads have their wages garnished.

Good luck with your decision and hope you find peace in what ever you decide.  I know this must be scary for you as it is a life altering decision.

Big hugs to you.

Di

Once again, SQ....I can only imagine how confusing and frightening this all must be for you.  It's a terribly difficult time, and you need good friends to help you through (hey, you're only human, we all need one another...).

And again, It's difficult for any of us to be able to determine what's best for you, because only YOU know yourself well enough to know what's right, and only you have a full grasp of your current circumstances.

that said,
I agree with Kbone somewhat.  I simply cannot judge your family since I don't know them, and yet...
If your family truly does love you (and I'm sure they do), they'll be able to forgive you....maybe not right away, though, so it might actually benefit you to....I dunno, "take a break" from your relationship with them?
You've got to take a stand and show them that you make decisions for yourself, not for anyone else.  They NEED to respect that.

I mean, hell....you've already committed a terrible "sin" by having sex, right?  if you hadn't gotten pregnant, would that have been forgivable?  Pose this question to them, and ask them to think it over critically and honestly.  If they cannot support your decision, you'll need to take the next step, whatever that may be.

and again....I can't tell you what to do, but I can only offer what I think I would do in your shoes.  We're with you, no matter what choice you make.

Very well stated.  I have 2 adult children that were raised with no father in the home.  But they have a grandfather, 2 uncles, 2 aunts and several cousins.  A child needs a family. Period.

I have to chime in on this. My mother was a single parent with no support.  I have no "family"...no father, no grandparents, no uncles, no aunts, no cousins, NONE! (Well they exist, but the contact we have with them is sending Christmas cards.) I turned out ok... I have a pretty nice life. So there are exceptions.

Very well stated.  I have 2 adult children that were raised with no father in the home.  But they have a grandfather, 2 uncles, 2 aunts and several cousins.  A child needs a family. Period.

I have to chime in on this. My mother was a single parent with no support.  I have no "family"...no father, no grandparents, no uncles, no aunts, no cousins, NONE! (Well they exist, but the contact we have with them is sending Christmas cards.) I turned out ok... I have a pretty nice life. So there are exceptions.

I agree with you.  When I said a child needs a family, I meant whatever that family entails.  Even if it is the mother alone. I have friends who were single mothers with no one to help them and their kids are also great people.  Also, my daughter is 23 and has never met her father.  She has never had a desire to meet him. I always left that choice up to her.  She told me "why do I need to meet him when I have you?"  I never asked for anything from him and he never offered anything for her. 

OK, people are soooo not getting what I was originally talking about.

Ideally children are better adjusted w/ both parents involved. They do not have to be married and living in the same house

NOW...

Additionally, and this was kinda mentioned regarding child support...what the hell are you going to do whenever the father comes up and it will. This is not a TV show. If she needs any kind of govt assistance at any point they will demand info on the father. To register for school they will demand info.
What about the birth certificate even. It will be left blank unless the father signs a paper which will require him to agree to support the child etc.

These are just a few issues....

If he doesn't want a child both their lives are going to be really complicated beyond the complications of single parenthood. And then what happens if he tries to assert parental rights later.

Also..WHEN YOU HAVE A KID W/ SOMEONE YOU ARE TIED TO THEM FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WHEATHER YOU WANT TO BE OR NOT

Life can certainly get "messy".  Your decision can be to end that little person's life to keep yours uncomplicated except for whatever emotional problems come with the abortion (if you don't tell your family that it was an abortion, that it was a miscarriage = not so little white lie).  Or if you decide to have the child, you'll have to deal with your family, including the father of the child.  I've seen many a grandparent change their tune about their "bastard" grandchild once the baby is here.  All the crap about premartial sex sin and other bull doesn't matter anymore to them. They help however they can.  No one can guarantee that will happen with your family and your child but I've seen it happen in my own family (a cousin) and with people I grew up with.  As for the father, he is morally and legally obligated to pay child support.  It doesn't matter if he didn't want the child.  He has to take responsibility for what you both did.  It's too late for him to "take back" his action.  You "play", you pay.  Maybe in the future, he'll be more careful if he's smart, but what is, is what is.  If he's the sort of person you absolutely do not want ever around your child, then legal action can be taken to protect you and the child.  Maybe in the future, you'll be more careful about who you make love with, but what is, is what is, for you, too.  Other than putting the child up for adoption which would require a level of maturity to make that decision, you've got to be a responsible adult if you choose to have the child.  If that doesn't appeal to you, you know what you've got to do.  Sorry, if this isn't sugarcoated enough but that's the way I see the situation from my vantage point of seeing similar situations over the years.