funny stories
Posted by Anonymous on Aug 17, 2007 · Member since Dec 1969 · 11789 posts
Do you have any funny stories you can tell (about anything)
One of the most funniest stories I ever heard was there were a couple of boys who decided to streak in a Denny's restaurant. (i remember this on the news).
They did it (streaked)-- they ran out to jump in their car that they had running and someone had stolen their car. The police was laughing so much that they decided not to press charges.
huh? That mande no sense to me...maybe you had to be there?
oh, i get it now, forgive me but I'm a little slowwwww.....
i once was walking into a store to buy some cloths and these two guys ran out with arms full of cloths and jumped into a waiting car. The security guards were running after them. Well the driver of the get away car refused to leave until all her passengers were safely buckled. After they had their seatbelts on she wen to leave and the engine stalled. By this time the security guards caught up with them and were very calmly writing down their license plate numbers and descriptions...by the time they got away the police were on their tails...ha ha. that was good one..
This is one of those things that, while I probably have a million of, I can't think of any when asked. :-\
oh, i get it now, forgive me but I'm a little slowwwww.....
I had to read it about three times before I understood...
I'm slow too.
I'm just making conversation.
Along the lines of the first story....
I am a skydiver and every once in a while people decide to do naked skydives. I have never myself, there are just some places I don't want a 120mph wind :o Anyway I had some friends that hid some clothes out away from the normal landing area so they could land and get dressed away from the eyes of lots of giggling skydivers and cameras. The load before a student landed out in this same area and found a bundle of clothes. Not understanding they grabbed the clothes and brought them back to the main hangar thinking they were being helpful. Those of us who have been around for a while just smiled and thanked the student for doing the neighborly thing and picking up the 'lost'' clothes. ;)
All we had to do was wait by the hangar doors and we new we would have our evening entertainment. We watched the load land and in a few minutes along came a couple of people wearing nothing but a parachute ;D Of course we handed their clothes right over after a few victory laps around the hangar. What can I say we get bored and have to find our entertainment some where.
I was at a wedding once and at the reception about halfway through the night the DJ played a game of Mr. and Mrs., not sure if you ever had that game here in the US but the premise is that a married couple are asked questions separately about each other and see if they get the same answers. So up on stage in front of 300 or so family and friends are the new bride and groom, best man and his old lady and chief bridemaid and her long term boyfriend. They send the women away and as the guys a few questions, the final question was "Where was the most unusual place you've had sex?" So the groom answers " At the bottom of the garden in my father-inlaws shed (small barn)." Everyone laughs and the father in-law takes it all in good fun.
So out come the girls and start answering the first few questions.........were did you meet, where was your first date etc. etc. So the DJ gets to the final question and the question gets round to the bride, she looks all embarrassed and is shaking her head and everyone is laughing, so her husband is nudging her and telling her it's OK I told everyone, so she is looking around and seeing her father laughing thinks it's OK to answer truthfully, so the DJ asks again "Lynda where is the most unusual place you've ever had sex?" the place is deadly silent waiting for Lynda's answer, to which she replies
"Up the bum"
The whole place could have been split down the middle, the young people were laughing hysterically, the old crowed were shocked, her father looked like he had seen a ghost, her mother was in tears and Granny was asking "What did she say???"
If this was not funny enough it turns out the question from the DJ was not quite specific enough, we assumed that when he asked the final question it was intended to be in reference to your current partner, unfortunately Lynda did not quite understand this. Her new husband was dumbstruck on the stage.
The wedding reception went downhill from there!
But they are still married to this day and that was about 15 years ago now.
I was at a wedding once
But they are still married to this day and that was about 15 years ago now.
Ohhhhh, it hurts! It hurts to laugh so hard! ;D
hahahhahaha
okay, glen- you win....hysterical!
OK this isn't mine but I relate--I really do!
You Know You Have a Bad Computer When...
10. The lower corner of screen has the words "Etch A Sketch"
on it.
9. When you insert a disk, it spits out a pack of
cigarettes.
8. You have to pedal it.
7. The manual contains one sentence: "Good luck!"
6. The only chip inside came from a bag of Doritos.
5. When you turn it on, the dogs in the neighborhood start
howling.
4. You catch a virus from it.
3. The screen frequently freezes and a message comes up:
"Ain't it break time, Chester?"
2. While running, it emits deafening calliope music.
1. It cyber-snickers at you.
I was at a wedding once
But they are still married to this day and that was about 15 years ago now.
Ohhhhh, it hurts! It hurts to laugh so hard! ;D
ditto! OMG! That was so hilarious!!!!
Bump!
this was really funny when i heard it, but i know it's horrible to laugh but.. i cant help it lol...
i was at work one morning and my boss and coworker were there and they like listening to the radio. the good thing was that it was early (6am-ish) so there was more talking on the radio than music. they played this segment they do sometimes called "war of the roses" that had happened a few days before.
"war of the roses" is basically they find women who think their partner is cheating on them, so they call the partner pretending to be a flower company and saying "you've won a free bouqet of a dozen roses, who would you like to send it to?"
the guy says " well can i send half to one person and half to another person" and the radio DJ pretending to be the flourist says "sure of course"
and then the partner says "can i send half to my secretary, and half to so-and-so".. so-and-so being NOT his wife. the guy got so mad when they told him who they really were, and his mother ended up calling in to defend his son about how great a guy he was and if the wife wasn't so fat, he wouldnt need to cheat
and like i said, it's horrible, but we were laughing so hard at this guy's reaction and his MOTHER calling in, we weren't even working at that point, we were all huddled around the radio laughing our butts off. especially when the DJ told the guy's mother that her son was a douche lol
and like i said, it's horrible, but we were laughing so hard at this guy's reaction and his MOTHER calling in, we weren't even working at that point, we were all huddled around the radio laughing our butts off. especially when the DJ told the guy's mother that her son was a douche lol
LMAO! Well he was a douche. ;D