chuck norris (nvr...but very light).. ;)
Posted by carmenmichelle on Jan 15, 2008 · Member since Apr 2005 · 233 posts
...when the boogey man goes to bed at night, he checks his closet for chuck norris....
....when chuck norris does a push up, he isn't really pushing himself up-he's pushing the world down....
i now pass the torch....
;D
Screw Alien vs Predator - we need a Rambo vs. Norris movie. That I may actually go see.
Chuck Norris never nursed. His mother fed him whiskey straight from the bottle.
Rambo would win. He would just shoot Chuck Norris halfway through his roundhouse kick.
Who would win in a fight - Rambo or Chuck Norris?
Rambo. Chuck Norris can hit, but if he's so great he probably has a hard time taking hits. Rambo can jump off a cliff and then sew up a gash on his arm. He's much more versitile.
Rambo would win. He would just shoot Chuck Norris halfway through his roundhouse kick.
Good point. (And "duh" for me.) Chuck Norris just uses his body. Rambo uses mondo machine guns.
But without his weapons, Rambo is nothing. It takes a true badass to take people down with nothing but your feet, fists, and arguably your killer beard. We're talking about a guy who roundhouse-kicked a bad guy into an open flame, kicked him out of a window, and aimed the kick so that the now burning, falling bad guy would fall right into a bunch of flammable explosives. Badass.
Personally, though, I think Jet Li could take them both. Fearless indeed.
But without his weapons, Rambo is nothing. It takes a true badass to take people down with nothing but your feet, fists, and arguably your killer beard. We're talking about a guy who roundhouse-kicked a bad guy into an open flame, kicked him out of a window, and aimed the kick so that the now burning, falling bad guy would fall right into a bunch of flammable explosives. Badass.
Personally, though, I think Jet Li could take them both. Fearless indeed.
I agree. Jet Li could take on both of them.
Sequel! Rambo vs Norris vs Li ... with a guest appearance by Tony Jaa.
These movies need to be made. Me and pretty much all of my friends would totally see both of these films on opening night.
http://www.blackbeltmag.com/images/Jet-Li-Lead-Photo.jpg
Don't mess with me, sucka!
Sequel! Rambo vs Norris vs Li ... with a guest appearance by Tony Jaa.
These movies need to be made. Me and pretty much all of my friends would totally see both of these films on opening night.
http://www.blackbeltmag.com/images/Jet-Li-Lead-Photo.jpg
Don't mess with me, sucka!
If that happened, I would be so there!
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
Chuck Norris can eat one Lay's potato chip
Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes
Chuck Norris can eat one Lay's potato chip
Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes
Okay, call me imbesile, I don't get these jokes.
Many wonder what a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick feels like, but dead men tell no tales.
Wo hu cang long. The translation from Mandarin Chinese reads: "Crouching Chuck, Hidden Norris"
I like these jokes way more than a should.
superman wears pajamas with pictures of chuck norris on them
http://mine.ihasahotdog.com/completestore/2008/1/20/ihavebeensod128453390087343750.jpg
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
"Rainbows are what happens when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks Richard Simmons."
"Chuck Norris eats coal and shits out diamonds."
"One time, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked Bruce Lee. The result was Jackie Chan and Jet Li."
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.....to bad he never cries.
They could never invent Chuck Norris toilet paper, because Chuck Norris doesn't take crap from anyone.
Sorry for "resurrecting an old/dead thread" but I feel this: Chuck Noris sues, says his tears no cancer cure http://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSN2129580420071222
"Penguin published "The Truth About Chuck Norris: 400 facts about the World's Greatest Human" in November. Author Ian Spector and two Web sites he runs to promote the book, including www.truthaboutchuck.com, are also named in the suit."
was worth it! ;D
There is no chin under Chuck Norris's beard, only another fist
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
*sigh* ahhh I remember these jokes...
Sorry for "resurrecting an old/dead thread" but I feel this: Chuck Noris sues, says his tears no cancer cure http://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSN2129580420071222
"Penguin published "The Truth About Chuck Norris: 400 facts about the World's Greatest Human" in November. Author Ian Spector and two Web sites he runs to promote the book, including www.truthaboutchuck.com, are also named in the suit."
was worth it! ;D
Haha the reuters article is priceless ;D
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