Posted by Anonymous on Sep 19, 2007 · Member since Dec 1969 · 11789 posts
Tell me something how many people think when a person asks a favor from another person it's a form of begging.
I think that's an interesting social issue.
Posted by feelinsoreal on Sep 19, 2007 · Member since Feb 2007 · 623 posts
It depends on the favor and how often. If someone asks me to help them, I'll do it, but if it gets repetitive and I know they're capable of doing it themselves, it's more like begging. Same with things like food, money, etc - I'm willing to share, but if you are capable of getting food and earning money yourself, I won't do so repeatedly.
I suppose that's more about mooching than begging, but those are my thoughts. Basically I believe in helping but not being, for lack of a better term, an enabler.
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Posted by Anonymous on Sep 19, 2007 · Member since Dec 1969 · 11789 posts
this is funny, cause i've been talking to quite a few people about asking for help the last couple days.
begging to me has an "unwanted" connotation. like "can you feed my cat?" isn't begging. bugging someone because they don't wanna feed your cat is begging.
one thing i noticed when i moved to NY was how different people were in terms of reciprocity and help-asking. back in the land of my home (seattle) it seemed more like if someone needed help, you helped them out. when you needed help, they help you out. it wasn't about keeping tabs but just being a decent person.
here i've met a lot of people who literally ask "what's in it for me?" when you ask for help. it kinda weirded me out at first. but i'm happy to report now that my friends are not buttheads.
but going back to the original question more specifically.... i am unsure what you mean by "a favor" and begging.... it seems to have different meanings to me. can you give an example? are we talking about people who know each other? strangers? either?
i just think most people are turds.
Oh there's people out there who think of nothing else other than what's in it for me? But there also many many people out there who would help you within a split second.
If you help somebody out I call it sometimes though your doing the person a favor. With close family and friends there is no such thing really on little stuff but with big stuff like lending you a loan yeah it is a favor.
With a stranger if he goes to help you he sees that you need help in something your car broke down say- to me that's not a favor not meaning to sound like an unappreciate oink oink here it's just human compassion to help out a fellow human being like that.
But if you ask a stranger to help you out yeah it is a favor it depends what is of course. For example your stranded on a deserted road. You have no cell phone. Someone stops and asks are you okay?You ask can you call someone up for me? That's not a very big deal to make a phone call for someone in need. But if you ask them to stay with you because your scared that's more of a favor.
Posted by Anonymous on Sep 19, 2007 · Member since Dec 1969 · 11789 posts
It depends on the favor and how often. If someone asks me to help them, I'll do it, but if it gets repetitive and I know they're capable of doing it themselves, it's more like begging. Same with things like food, money, etc - I'm willing to share, but if you are capable of getting food and earning money yourself, I won't do so repeatedly.
I suppose that's more about mooching than begging, but those are my thoughts. Basically I believe in helping but not being, for lack of a better term, an enabler.
Posted by hespedal on Sep 19, 2007 · Member since Mar 2006 · 5259 posts
It depends on the favor and how often. If someone asks me to help them, I'll do it, but if it gets repetitive and I know they're capable of doing it themselves, it's more like begging. Same with things like food, money, etc - I'm willing to share, but if you are capable of getting food and earning money yourself, I won't do so repeatedly.
I suppose that's more about mooching than begging, but those are my thoughts. Basically I believe in helping but not being, for lack of a better term, an enabler.
I agree.
i agree as well.
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Posted by yabbitgirl on Sep 20, 2007 · Member since Apr 2006 · 14266 posts
Begging to me means mooching, and whining when they're not allowed to mooch. It's the whining friend who tends to get agressive when their begging is refused.
Not to be confused with smooching. ;D ;D ;D
Here we have people on the streets literally putting their hands out and begging; but in my own mind, most "normal" folks would starve or steal before they'd beg. The beggars we have here are professionals at it, and some do very, very well out of it. But I can't see sitting on a streetcorner come rain or come shine; I'd rather work.
It depends on the favor and how often. If someone asks me to help them, I'll do it, but if it gets repetitive and I know they're capable of doing it themselves, it's more like begging. Same with things like food, money, etc - I'm willing to share, but if you are capable of getting food and earning money yourself, I won't do so repeatedly.
I suppose that's more about mooching than begging, but those are my thoughts. Basically I believe in helping but not being, for lack of a better term, an enabler.
this is funny, cause i've been talking to quite a few people about asking for help the last couple days.
begging to me has an "unwanted" connotation. like "can you feed my cat?" isn't begging. bugging someone because they don't wanna feed your cat is begging.
one thing i noticed when i moved to NY was how different people were in terms of reciprocity and help-asking. back in the land of my home (seattle) it seemed more like if someone needed help, you helped them out. when you needed help, they help you out. it wasn't about keeping tabs but just being a decent person.
here i've met a lot of people who literally ask "what's in it for me?" when you ask for help. it kinda weirded me out at first. but i'm happy to report now that my friends are not buttheads.
but going back to the original question more specifically.... i am unsure what you mean by "a favor" and begging.... it seems to have different meanings to me. can you give an example? are we talking about people who know each other? strangers? either?
i just think most people are turds.
Oh there's people out there who think of nothing else other than what's in it for me? But there also many many people out there who would help you within a split second.
If you help somebody out I call it sometimes though your doing the person a favor. With close family and friends there is no such thing really on little stuff but with big stuff like lending you a loan yeah it is a favor.
With a stranger if he goes to help you he sees that you need help in something your car broke down say- to me that's not a favor not meaning to sound like an unappreciate oink oink here it's just human compassion to help out a fellow human being like that.
But if you ask a stranger to help you out yeah it is a favor it depends what is of course. For example your stranded on a deserted road. You have no cell phone. Someone stops and asks are you okay?You ask can you call someone up for me? That's not a very big deal to make a phone call for someone in need. But if you ask them to stay with you because your scared that's more of a favor.
It depends on the favor and how often. If someone asks me to help them, I'll do it, but if it gets repetitive and I know they're capable of doing it themselves, it's more like begging. Same with things like food, money, etc - I'm willing to share, but if you are capable of getting food and earning money yourself, I won't do so repeatedly.
I suppose that's more about mooching than begging, but those are my thoughts. Basically I believe in helping but not being, for lack of a better term, an enabler.
I agree.
It depends on the favor and how often. If someone asks me to help them, I'll do it, but if it gets repetitive and I know they're capable of doing it themselves, it's more like begging. Same with things like food, money, etc - I'm willing to share, but if you are capable of getting food and earning money yourself, I won't do so repeatedly.
I suppose that's more about mooching than begging, but those are my thoughts. Basically I believe in helping but not being, for lack of a better term, an enabler.
I agree.
i agree as well.
Begging to me means mooching, and whining when they're not allowed to mooch. It's the whining friend who tends to get agressive when their begging is refused.
Not to be confused with smooching. ;D ;D ;D
Here we have people on the streets literally putting their hands out and begging; but in my own mind, most "normal" folks would starve or steal before they'd beg. The beggars we have here are professionals at it, and some do very, very well out of it. But I can't see sitting on a streetcorner come rain or come shine; I'd rather work.