Help my son has a new girlfriend and she's a vegan!
I am a traditional cook. We're Portuguese and Italian. I can cook anything. I can cook vegetarian dishes ---cheese or egg based--but I am stumped on what to cook a vegan for Sunday dinner. My son and his new girlfriend come every week for dinner and while I try to incorporate her meal with ours..so she doesn't feel different...I am running out of ideas. First time, I made fajitas---and everyone could choose their own toppings...meat, veggies, beans, etc. That was a hit with everyone. Then I made a pasta dinner, and simply prepared a plain marinara sauce for her--and everyone else had a meat sauce.
Last week, we had stir fry and I made chicken stir fry, shrimp stir fry and a veggie stir fry. I always use a separate pot for her and clean utensils so nothing is cross-contaminated.
But I am running out of ideas!! My son is not a vegan but they seem to manage just fine in both vegan and conventional restaurants.
We love his new girlfriend and want her to feel welcome. At the same time, I don't want the rest of the family to have to go without the meals and foods they love. I don't want to make something totally different for her and make her feel awkward.
But what about when I want to make a pot roast? or a roast chicken dinner? How can I accomodate her too? Thanks for your help.
first, that is sooo nice of you to do that for her!
second, you have come to the right site, there are tons of recipes for all kind of things on here.
one thing i would say, is do you and your family mind eating vegan? it seems like a lot of work for you to make separate meals and you could always just have everyone eat a vegan dinner on sundays.
i would say some good ideas are curry, pot pie, soups and salads, tamales (really any mexican food could be made vegan). these are simple things though.. if you like to make fancy meals, cali should be along with a gorgeous menu for you (she is excellent at coming up with ideas like that).
Can you be my mother?? I know my wife would surely appreciate my mother being so considerate of her wishes. I also know if she was, my wife would be happy to share with her what she could make to accomodate her diet choices and maybe even help in the preparations as well. Something to consider anyway. I would just like to send you a big hug for being so willing to make your son's friend happy and comfortable in your home. :)>>>
What a nice future mother in law you are!!!
Chili is a really easy vegan recipe that tastes just as good to omnivores, this was the first thing my parents veganized when i went vegetarian. You could use beans or soy beef crumbles (you can buy these at most grocery stores). When i'm eating with omnivore family members, what makes a dinner yummy is if there are a lot of awesome vegan side dishes. So what if I dont eat the main meaty course, at least I can have some mashed potatoes (with soy milk and margarine), green bean casserole, stuffing and some yummy french bread (this is sounding like thanksgiving now...). I would feel at home if there were a variety of side dishes to eat. Even if I dont get a main course hunk of meat. Side dishes are often times really easy to make vegan. And there are A LOT to chose from on this website.
Thats so great that you are going out of your way to incorporate her diet!! ;)b
some easy vegan meals, that everyone will love would certainly make it easier for you...
pot pie, shepherds pie,
soups, stews.
try some grain salads w/ beans or lentils and veggies.
falafel w/ hummus, avocado, etc
asian style foods, like spring rolls, etc
bbq...veggies grilled and grilled tofu or seitan, mushroom burgers...you can use a vegan bbq sauce that you may already like (just check ingredients)
pizza
pasta w/ pesto
try the stuffed shells w/ tofu "ricotta"... you can use the same filling in a lasagna or other pasta dish.
check out the casseroles on this site..potato, bean or veggie.
http://vegweb.com/index.php?action=recipecategories
a vegan meal once or twice a week should be easy for everyone to enjoy. It doesnt have to be completely "out there".
Annie,
If you are making the kind of meal that is a meat dish with several side dish accompaniments, then for her to have a satisfying meal all you need to do is slice up and broil or pan fry her some tofu, or open a can of chickpeas and put some olive oil on them, or get some packaged meat substitutes and heat them up and it can sit on her plate where the chicken would be. I would ask her if she eats any of those products and which ones she likes. There is a huge assortment of substitute meat stuff available, some of which is vegan and some not, but you should not feel bad at all about heating up some chickn fingers for her.
The other kind of meal is more problematic--like the elaborate seafood dishes that are popular in portuguese restaurants. Truthfully, when I dine at Portuguese restaurants there isn't much I can eat besides the potatoes. For those types of meals you would need to make a separate dish for her, like some quinoa with chickpeas or something like that. There is a company called Tofurkey that makes an excellent Italian sausage substitute that you could panfry for her on the weeks when you have sausage and peppers (which I'm assuming you do).
Maybe what you can do is rotate the kinds of meals you have so that maybe one week she's eating a chickn patty and the next week she's eating a chickpea stew dish while everyone else eats that and some meat-infused dish and the next week everyone eats something vegan (like homemade potato gnocchi or cavatelli with broccoli and white beans or a shepherds pie made with soy crumbles instead of ground beef or stuffed roasted portobello mushrooms).
No matter what you decide to do, I think you should check out some books on vegetarian cooking from your local library. This site has a lot of recipes too and there are lots of other sites available on the internet. One site that has a bunch of recipes reprinted from vegan cookbooks is www.veganpeace.com
Good luck!
PS: one additional thought is that you should totally enlist your son's help with this. I would get him to give you a list of the stuff she likes and ideas for meals. I don't know how old these kids are or how long she has been vegan, but presumably it's been long enough that she can give him some ideas that he can pass on to you. And lastly, I can understand that as an accomplished cook you are seeing this as a challenge to your skills and creativity (because I am the same way when non-veggies come to MY house) but you need to put that aside because you'll make yourself crazy. I'm guessing that she appreciates the thought most of all and she will be very happy with a veggie burger and a baked sweet potato.
That's so awesome that you want to make her feel welcome enough that you came here for advice. This site was posted here not too long ago and I think it's a really good reference for non vegans cooking for vegans: http://www.wikihow.com/Feed-a-Vegan-for-Three-Days-or-More
Also you can look here: http://www.peta.org/accidentallyVegan/ for "accidentally" vegan products available at your local supermarkets.
Also just look at the tons of recipes on this site as there are tons of really good ones that everyone should like. Good luck and have fun cooking! :)
Thank you all so much for your advice and tips! I went to another vegan website before i found you guys.....and the people were not nearly as friendly and helpful. In fact, I got more criticism than anything else....cause my family eats meat. I jst got a ton of lectures!! You all have been awesome and have given me some great tips! Thanks so much.
I'm realizing that it's not as hard as I think. I already am a semi-organic cook since my daughter went organic in her teens. She's now just out of college and still at home and has taught me very simple ways to improve our diets without giving up good taste--and while she is not vegan...she eats no beef or pork or "white stuff". I only cook with fresh ingredients-- and try to go with whole grains, etc.....so it really isn't that hard.
My son and his girlfriend may have very different diets (he is a meat & potatoes guy) but he is open to her way of life and regularly eats vegan meals with her....even if it means he stops for a cheeseburger on the way home!) And his girlfriend is nonjudgmental about his diet as well. Although..she does claim she can smell it on him if he just came out of Taco Bell or Wendy's!) In any case, they are both in their late 20"s--not living together yet, but I think they can manage if they do. For now they each have their own apartments, but spend most nights together and cook together. She won't cook meat, but has no problem if he does. That's fair. And when they cook for eachother,they will make something he is already used to, like Pasta and sauce, or Veggie fajitas, etc.
As for our Weekly Family Sunday dinners--I'm not stressing anymore...Thank You!! Tonite, yes I am grilling STEAKS, BUT I made an awesome Pasta & Veggie salad, baked potatoes, Vegetable Medley and I'm grilling Portobello Mushrooms too...cause everyone loves them.
It's not so hard to use some margarine instead of butter for the potatoes. And cook the veggies in olive oil & garlic. And yeah, a couple times a week, my husband and I eat meatless meals cause we know meat is not that good for us.
A few of you suggested I involve her in the process and I liked that idea! I'll ask them for input and even to come early and help prepare dinner. Our home is like grocery store...we have everthing.....she could help me in learning to cook "her style."
So I guess what I was so afraid of turned out to be not such a big deal...Please keep your tips coming and thanks so much...I have already found so may great recipes here that I would have prepared for myself before I even met my son's new GF! Funniest thing is that one of my son's friends made fun of him on his Facebook page, saying...."So I hear you're eating rabbit food now...is that because you like it??" And my son said" No...it's cause I LOVE HER!....and it's a small price to pay when you find the right person!"
aw your son sounds as sweet as you! what a nice reply to his friends comment.
sorry you ran into some rude militant vegans. eek.
I'm so impressed at your open mindedness and willingness to learn! She will appreciate that so much, the simple fact you are happy to make an effort and include her.
I've had some challenges with partners' families before, (things like turning up for dinner and having a whole uncooked cabbage plonked on my plate to be funny) and it sounds like you are miles ahead of all of them. I don't really have advice to add but just wanted to throw in my encouragement :)
Can you be my boyfriend's mom?
Please?
:)>>>
You are a very compassionate Mom. As long as it's vegan, it doesn't matter if it's a simple or elaborate dinner. The very fact that you are senstiive to her ethics and make her feel like she's part of the family goes a long way.
At other people's homes, I have been very happy with the following meals:
Tostadas
Veggie burgers and fries
Lentil soup w/salad
Baked potato topped with steamed veggies
Baked yam with brown sugar and cinnamon
Pizza (cheeseless, with tomato sauce and loaded with bell peppers, mushroom)
Turkey sandwich(made with vegan turkey deli slices found at most mainstream grocery stores) mustard, lettuce, tomatoes
Chili dogs (made with veggie dogs found at most major grocery stores)
Falafel sandwich (falafels, hummus, lettuce, tomato, cucumber)
OMG!!! i have the exactly same problem!!! well kinda lol my bf is hindu so his vegetarian and im 1\2 mexican and 1\2 english so i have no idea what can i cook that he can eat i can like!!! u know something vegetarian but still yummy!!! any ideas???
OMG!!! i have the exactly same problem!!! well kinda lol my bf is hindu so his vegetarian and im 1\2 mexican and 1\2 english so i have no idea what can i cook that he can eat i can like!!! u know something vegetarian but still yummy!!! any ideas???
Actually... I cook a LOT of "mexican" food and just replace the meat with beans or chickpeas. Some of my favorite foods are mexican-inspired. Love those spices!
You could also ask him for some of his favorite recipes. Vegetarian food is by no means boring. My boyfriend is not completely vegetarian, but he's very supportive of me and we've tried foods we would otherwise never have considered. Indian curry, stir-fry with tofu and rice, grilled avocado sandwiches...
Everything is just as delicious without meat, and we were pleasantly surprised. My thoughts are if you can cook traditional mexican, you're a big step ahead of me when I started out! Just don't limit yourself by thinking of what you can't use. Get creative and find things you haven't tried before!
OMG!!! i have the exactly same problem!!! well kinda lol my bf is hindu so his vegetarian and im 1\2 mexican and 1\2 english so i have no idea what can i cook that he can eat i can like!!! u know something vegetarian but still yummy!!! any ideas???
In Mexican meals I replace cheese with avocado. Mashed avocado spread in a tortilla with grilled veggies = "quesa"dillas, avocado slices in corn tortillas topped with mole = enchiladas, bean tacos topped with diced avocado instead of shredded cheese. Also, never underestimate the awesomeness of beans and rice. You can also buy or make vegan sour cream or yogurt as a condiment. ;)b
Something she may be be left speechless is if you made some kind of vegan desert that was hard for her to give up. It can be simple like icecream i like good karma in vanilla and my meat eating friends can't tell the difference. If you would like to go fancy a nice chocolate cake is always pleasant. I have been cooking like this for a long time since I am lactose intolerant and have the worst stomach on the earth, if you ever need dessert help or anything feel free to email me, just ask for my email. Most of my dishes I serve to friends and they never know it has no milk because it doesn't taste like a dairy free dessert or food. One of my favorite foods is just a sweet potatoe bakes and smart balance organic is vegan and earth balance margin is vegan and then yougurts alot of people tend to like the new coconut milk yogurt so you can make some indian dishes just you non dairy subsitutes.
For the record... I LOVE Indian food!
:)>>>
I like choc soy chica's idea - have some sort of easy vegan dessert. The thing is, as you've discovered, it's actually reasonably easy to come up with food-food that is vegan or vegan-izable. But it's harder to come by vegan desserts (at least initially, and especially depending where you are - city or rural). I've seen soy ice cream at many mainstream grocery stores now. And, if you like to bake, cake has got to be one of the easiest things to make vegan. If you're interested, check out some of the popular dessert recipes on here... vegan doesn't mean we don't like our sucrose!
I always had a pretty easy time figuring out vegan foods for myself when I first went vegan, and my family has pretty much adapted. My boyfriend's family, on the other hand, still struggles occasionally. His family is Guatemalan, which means some very meat-centered meals but some very not. Things I've had while with them: refried black beans, pan frances, fried plantains (platanos fritos), bean pupusas, homemade masa tortillas (:)!), tamales, avocado tostadas, etc...
And it's not Guatemalan, but we loooove salsa & chips. Very simple, inherently vegan snack food.
Of course you can ask her what she makes for herself... since it's not as easy to eat out of boxes and cans as a vegan, she likely cooks as well. Speaking of boxes, though, boxed falafel mix is easy and tasty.