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Dealing with being "poor".

I wrote "poor" instead of poor because I do have a job and its not like I'm starving or anything, but I am in debt and find myself having to get a second job if I want to not be in debt anytime soon. I also want to go back to school and move out of my dads house (I'm 21, not like that really matters, but..). I don't know how possible it will be to work two part time jobs and go to school, so I will probably have to put off school even longer but it seems like the longer I wait the less likely it will actually happen.

Anyway, it sucks and I know (I hope, at least) it's only temporary. I would really like to hear stories from your own lives if you are in similar financial distress. Taliking about it and knowing other people have been there too makes it help a little. To me at least.

My husband and I are both teachers and I recently lost my position (at 8 months pregnant!). I am applying for medicaid to help cover my pregnancy, and also applied for unemployment. I think I might actually qualify for both! I never thought I'd be in this situation, but life has thrown us a loop. I can get unemployment for 6 months.

My husband's paycheck will not cover our bills, and now we have a newborn to take care of....more $$$$! Any kind of job I could get during the day would not be worth it to pay for child care. I might end up waiting tables on the weekends. I'm still looking into teaching some after school art classes, but there are some snags we are trying to tackle at the moment. I can't work right now, as I'm nursing 10X per day, and also recovering from surgery.

I have decided to be more frugal...making my own laundry detergent, wipe solution, cloth diapering, not eating out, buying White Rain shampoo instead of some organic brand,  etc.....we do have some savings but I sure don't want to burn through it. Especially since now I'm not contributing anything to my retirement....

if my dh ever decides to leave me I am screwed! I hate being dependent on people. Before I could have survived on my own, but now......no way. I have no reason to believe we would split up....just saying, if we did, I'm doomed. I guess he would be too, so we are stuck together!

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yay. i just got my first unemployment check....i feel like such a loser, but i guess its meant for people like me who lost jobs unfairly.

when i add it up and then look at what i was going to make teaching part time minus day care, im coming out about even. i can get it for 6 months. maybe by then i will figure out what to do!

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besan

  ???

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So, I just got a raise yesterday. Thats the one bit of financial good news to come to me in a long while. I have to keep telling myself that all of this money crap is temporary and I WILL be debt free with money in savings by Janurary first. That is my one focus right now. Getting a second job and paying down my debts and I am giving myself four and a half months to do so.

I am done stressing about money and bills
I am done feeling crushed under the weight of debt
I am done beating myself up about bad financial mistakes I've made
I am done living above my means
And I am SO done letting it get me so damn depressed.

From here on out it is postive thinking, postive thinking, POSTIVE THINIIKNG

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yay. i just got my first unemployment check....i feel like such a loser, but i guess its meant for people like me who lost jobs unfairly.

when i add it up and then look at what i was going to make teaching part time minus day care, im coming out about even. i can get it for 6 months. maybe by then i will figure out what to do!

You are definitely NOT a loser! You are amazing and I admire your strength! :)

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Just wanted to say that we are in the "poor" boat too! It's not fun, but life happens. For us, it has been one medical thing and major house thing after another and unfortunately, it adds up VERY quickly, so now we are living paycheck to paycheck. We're thankful that my hubby has  a stable job, but he's thinking of getting a second job until I am able. I can't right now...I'm one of the big medical bills. Between my neck and ankle, I've managed to wrack up about $1500 in the last month alone. We're dealing by just praying an awful lot and cutting back where we can. I shop sales and we eat a lot of beans, rice, and pasta. I Freecycle, which has been a tremendous help. Someone was kind enough to give my daughter a complete wardrobe for FREE! We keep our lights out  and the air off. Now, my mom may have to move in with us because she is about to lose her house! Argh...But things will get better, we all just have to hang in there! :)

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besan

  ???

Besan = chick pea flour, also known as "gram" flour (not graham, which is something else, wheat I think.)

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  To Abrimmer re: collecting unemployment.  You are absolutely NOT a loser.  I was an actor for many years in NY, and believe me those unemployment checks between contracts kept us alive!! 

Every week your employer paid a an amount based on a percentage of your salary to Unemployment compensation just as all legitimate employers do. It's a safety net for those who lose their jobs.

It's also one of those horrible, vile "socialist" programs that Konservative right wingers degrade constantly and would like to be rid of...you know, like "medicare" and "social security"

Stay proud and positive and be thankful that all the shreds of a decent democracy haven't been destroyed.....yet.

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ABrimmer, your taxes while you were teaching were going into the state's coffers. Your unemployment comes out of those same coffers. You were contributing. You didn't just quit your job and slough off...it was taken from you. You wanted to keep working and keep earning.

You have earned those unemployment checks!! They are yours by right. When you get another job you'll contribute again. And we know you want a decent job, you're not just going to kick back and become a "parasite".

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Okay...I've decided that I need to apply EVERYWHERE so that I can get a second job fairly quickly. I got the permanent days off on my schedule at Wal Mart, so I can go get another job. I soooooooooooooooooooooo don't want to go the fast food route AT ALL, but I'm afraid I'll have to suck it up and do it if I have to. I'm afraid non ff places won't want to hire me because I work at Wal Mart ( I was thinking about applying at supermarkets, dollar stores and pretty much anywhere but any fast food joint). I applied at Petco, UPS, two supermarkets, and Subway. I have a friend who's a manager at Sonic, so I'm going to see if she can hook me up with a job a few days a week if NOTHING else goes through.

I'm just trying to keep my head and save as much money as possible. And focus and getting another f-ing job.

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Does anyone have experience with these things:

Truck driving (yes, I'm considering it)
Being a vendor at grocery stores (like Coke, Pepsi, Frito Lay...)
School Bus Driving/ Lunch Server
Medical drug testing trials
House keeping/ being a maid
Selling stuff like Avon or Mary Kay
Cable installer
Working at a gas station

If so, please tell my what its like and if one could do it part time.

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Does anyone have experience with these things:

Truck driving (yes, I'm considering it)
Being a vendor at grocery stores (like Coke, Pepsi, Frito Lay...)
School Bus Driving/ Lunch Server
Medical drug testing trials
House keeping/ being a maid
Selling stuff like Avon or Mary Kay
Cable installer
Working at a gas station

If so, please tell my what its like and if one could do it part time.

i'd wait on the drug trials til after you have kids. you never know what that stuff will do. I've had friends do the beer vendor thing, they loved it. Hard hard work, good $$$. good luck!! it will get better, i swear.

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I didn't do house keeping....but did clean at banks and office buildings when I was younger.  It wan't that hard work, I could listen to a walkman and it was a set schedule every night.  5:30 - 9:30pm so I could fit it in with my other job.  The only thing I didn't like was cleaning the bathrooms.  It was really disgusting cleaning up pee/poo because people are too lazy to make sure they hit the toliet.

Also, I briefly sold MK abut 12 years ago.  I did ok at it but never really felt comfortable showing people how to put make-up on since I didn't know how to do that myself.  My best times were at hairy leg parties or manicure parties.  If I had been more of an extrovert it would have been a fun thing to do.  I don't know if they still recommend this but when you first start out, they suggest that you buy these large packages of popular products to have on hand to get your business off the ground.  I took out a loan for $3000 to buy one.  Needless to say I was still paying that after I stopped selling MK.  If you decide to sell MK, I'd suggest having a couple parties to get orders and then place your big order for product.  Start with family and friends so that they don't mind waiting to get their stuff

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Thanks Steviedog and yabbitgirl. I appreciate the kind words, but the words of encouragement about receiving unemployment should go to little2ant. I had quoted her and responded to her statement of feeling like a loser. I apologize for it being unclear. I agree with you though, no one should feel like a loser for getting unemployment, especially in little2ant's case. She's a teacher and it's more than well deserved! :)

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I remember growing up poor.  I started doing peoples homework and giving people anwers on tests for money in like 6 grade so I could have some money to buy my contacts and clothes.  I got my first real job at 15 because I lied about my age.  I told myself I would never ask for government help then had to swallow a big piece of humble pie and get medicaid when I was pregnant.  Then 3 years later I had to apply for food stamps.  I felt so bad.  Then my mom told me to get over it because her taxes were paying for it and I've worked for 8 years so my taxes were paying for it too.  Yeah being 'poor' money wise sucks.  But, being poor spiritually, emotinally, or physically is worse. 

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I recieve social security income. I get $674 a month. $379 (? I can't remember exactly, I just moved in) goes towards rent. It's much better than before when I paid $599 for rent. $75 a month is not much at all. It sucked. There's still no chance of me being able to afford a car, insurance, registration, gas, etc. I now have a bus pass but I'm still trying to figure it out. I'm going through an employment agency to hopefully get a job soon, but it really won't help me earn much since most of it will be taken out of my SSI. There is such a glitch in the cycle. People that are on SSI and do want to get off of it are stuck, leaving us relying on the government to survive.

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I'll join in. I grew up poor. Money was really tight, I was raised by my great grandma who was living off social security and her pension from a job she worked for 50 years. I grew up very humble in some sense. Fashion and name brands don't really interest me. My grandma was an avid thrift store shopper because she knew that she was helping people have jobs and getting stuff she needed for less.

It took me a long time to accept the second hand stores, but now I think they're awesome. Reuse/recycle, totally the way to go. So thats one way to save some money. Also go shopping once a week unless you live a long ways from a store. You're less likely to have food to bad, plan your meals ahead, I know its hard but its worth it, only buy what you NEED for those meals. No junk foods!

I live in a cold state in the usa (Iowa) it gets really cold here sometimes. Don't turn your heat on unless you HAVE to. Today is the first day I've had my heat on really and thats because I have a little kid here right now and two because its snowing outside. Its gotten down to 55 degrees in my house and I just put on an extra layer of clothes. You won't believe how much money this will save, I only have an apartment and I save 60 dollars a month on my gas bill, I can only imagine how this would help people with a house. Same thing with the AC, Don't turn it on UNLESS YOU HAVE TO! In the summer I had the ac on for maybe a week. That was because it was so humid you couldn't really breathe. We had a very off summer.

Buy local, I think most people know this, and it took me a long time to actually start doing it and I dunno why. If you really search around the deals are there. Also coupons are your friend! Don't listen to everyone else and cut those coupons. Check out websites online that have printable coupons. I honestly bought a printer way back when just for the coupons, it has already paid for itself 3 fold.

Don't eat premade/boxed food. I know thats a given but some people don't get it. Don't buy canned soups for instances (I remember reading a post on freezing soups hehe!) make them yourself. Its super easy, plus there are a bunch of great soup recipes on this website! (shameless plug). But you can do that with more then soups, I've made whole meals and froze them before.

I guess I should also mention I know what it feels like to have your back pinned and not knowing what you're gonna do. Beginning of september this year (09) I hurt my spine. I ended up rupturing two disks, herniating another one. I currently have close to 8,000 dollars of medical bills from all the mris and stuff I had to have done. I can't work because I can't stand up that long, and the pain makes me physically sick. Like some of you, I have worked a good part of my life. I got my first "job" around 10 yrs old watching children for some spare money to help my grandma pay the bills. At 14 I got my first real job. I actually worked at a thrift store as a cashier, my mom's new bf helped me get the job. At 16 I got married and moved out with my wonderful husband. I took odd jobs here and there, helped my motherinlaw when I could. At 17 we got our first apartment together. My husband supported both of us on minimum wage until my 18th birthday. I got my ged, and started working in healthcare. I took care of the physically and mentally retarded. When I was 19 I was abused at my job and almost destroyed my left shoulder. The nerves and muscles were damaged really bad. I ended up quitting that job and we moved again back to my hometown. I decided we couldn't afford for me not to work, and I was determined to make it on my own. I got my dream job working in a professional kitchen. That was wonderfull, I was finally doing what I wanted, but it was shortlived. Due to my shoulder injure I couldn't lift a lot of weight, and after so long of forcing through the pain I couldn't take it anymore. I had to suck up my pride and quit that job. But I was still determined. So I started work for a large retail *coughs*walmart*coughs* chain, I was a cashier/whatever else needed to be done person. I worked there for a few months, had a fight with the store mgr, quit and then became a house keeper. I did that for 6 months until a new store mgr. hired me back at that retail chain. I worked there, happily for about a year. The pain in my shoulder constantly reminding me i shouldn't be doing this. My husband is wonderful because when I got home, no matter how his day at work went, he would rub my shoulder until It would untense and I could get to sleep. Then it happened, I was afraid of it too, I hurt my other shoulder. It was strained from compensating for my left shoulder and finally gave out. So now I have two hurt shoulders and more pain then I ever wanted. Ontop of that they were raising our rent and my husband's ex wife had the child support doubled and forced extra medical onto him. We couldn't even afford our rent. We broke down and got food assistance, and that was hard for me to accept, I felt like less of a person. Finally we ended up moving to where we are now, have across the state to a lower rent housing apartment. Truthfully its beautiful here and I'm glad I ended up here. I decided to go back to that large retail chain and get a job here. I worked there for a year until like I said last september.

So thats my story, after I hurt my back I am currently on food assistance, and I'll freely admit it. I don't qualify for medicare, and I'm currently filing for disability because I can't work anymore and have come to terms with it. It was a hard thing to understand, and at 22 years old I feel like a failure in life. I know I shouldn't but I do. Ontop of all this I am in so much debt I can bearly hold my head up anymore and I can't find a lawyer to help me file bankruptcy (that I can afford).

But each day I wake up and fight for my life. Not because I want to but because I have to, and thats more a life lesson then I ever could have learned so I guess I am humbled because of it.

I dunno if my story will help anyone but thats my story :) everyday I tell myself one thing that gets me through "It could be worse"

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buy bulk.
cook at home, pack a lunch.
find free things to have fun. eases the mind.
dumpster if you can get with that.
sell random things on craigslist.
stay focused, keep positive.

deff follow all of that. buy lots of generic even though it might not be organic or whatever. dried beans are really cheap and so is bulk rice. I make rice and beans once a week and it feeds me for a day or two. Get stuff from goodwill and salvation army, and dumpster if you can.

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I grew up pretty poor, since my father didn't work.  He still doesn't, and is semi-retired and trying to get disability, which is turning out to be a pain in the butt.  So I got used to not having much pretty early on in life, which is making being super poor right now easier.  It also made it really easy to give up meat, since we never had anything but ground turkey and frozen fish at my house, so I don't miss the other stuff that I've never had. 
I'm a student, taking 19 credits this semester and 17 next semester, and it sucks since it really cuts into the hours that I could be working.  Right now I'm earning a little money doing research and tutoring, but I have no job to work during j-term and net semester, though I applied for a job at the school I hope to get.  But it sucks that nowhere is hiring right now, since it means that neither my boyfriend or me can get jobs.  But I'm keeping my head up knowing that at least my schooling is cheap (only $11,000 a year, and I'm not taking out loans for all of it) and that my parents help when they can by sending me a little bit of money and buying me groceries when I come home.  I also still have health insurance through them (which a lot of my friends don't have) and they gave me a car to use and are still paying the insurance for it and my phone bill, since I'm on their plan.  I hate being so dependent on them, but I'm hoping things turn around soon so that I can be more self sufficient.

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I'm pretty poor myself. make a little over minimum wage and support 2 adults and baby on that. Best way to go is abuse the government by finding subsidized housing, getting food stamps, government health insurance, etc. I used to spend maybe 15$ a week on food and steal the rest from my job. Then the baby came and along came 350$ worth of foodstamps monthly, 150$ a month of baby food and formula, 90$ a month 2 bedroom apartment. Not so bad anymore. I also get to go to school for free. Now i finally have enough money to be vegan again(thanks foodstamps)

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