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Open letters

Seeing as we've got confessions and problems and issues springing up in threads all over the shop, I thought it might be interesting to have an open letter thread. Cathartic, perhaps. From your mother ruining your wedding, to your boyfriend who can't stop peeing on the toilet seat, or even that guy on the bus who kept making that annoying noise with his mouth, get it out here.

I'll get the ball rolling.

To my dear darling boyfriend,

Just because you are technically 'clean' when you come out the shower, it doesn't mean that I am okay with using the same towel you've been rubbing all over yourself for a month. I know you have others. I bought you two myself. Drag them out from the murky depths of the laundry basket, wash them and allow me the temporary use of a clean one.

Love, Cat

Dear D, When you ask me to help with stuff again, expect a "no". You said before Christmas that you wanted to get to know me better. I invited you for tea. I understand you had some health issues and had to put it off a while but inviting me to help in a group, suggesting we have the tea with the group and then going off on a business trip without telling me was a bit much. Oh, and then the purpose of the meeting changed without notice to me too. That does not include the two instances where you argued my opinions with me when they were obviously personal likes an not "facts". I have decided I know you as well as I want to know you. You will never be more than someone I say "hi" to when we happen to cross paths. - T

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Dear self,
Stop freaking out and crying. You litterally have no good reason to be doing so. Sleep now.
-You.

Dear Prestons friends,
Please get out of my house. You're really loud and I have to wake up in 6 hours for my first day of class and my plan was to sleep an hour ago.
-Sarah

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Dear Sleep,

Where were you last night? And the night before.....and the night before? Every night I invite you in and every night insomnia shows up in your place. You suck!

Sincerely,

Dead Tired

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Dear Storm,
He certainly wasn't here last night, either.
BTW I'll take delivery on some rain if you've got any going extra.
Love,
Sleepless in Sevilla

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Dear Storm,
He certainly wasn't here last night, either.
BTW I'll take delivery on some rain if you've got any going extra.
Love,
Sleepless in Sevilla

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Dear Yabbit,

He is quite the elusive bastard, isn't he? I would love to have sent you some of the weekend rain but alas, it has gone away.

Hugs,

Storm

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Dear Whatever Your Name Really Is,
No wonder your limbacha loncha didn't work, if you "gave Manisha's blog a wide berth." You should have paid attention to the process and pictures, instead of feeling superior to her. Your pickle probably molded because you didn't stir it every day. Or you didn't make sure the jars were dry.
Now you've decided that limbacha loncha is "too hard" to make? Go spend your money on Patak's expensive, second-rate pickle.
That's what happens when you turn up your nose at someone just because they are from a different area than you, or speak another language, or dress differently. You lose out on so much.
I'm a lowly, uninitiated Anglo, and Manisha's recipes work perfectly, every time...as long as you pay attention and follow instructions.
Willingness to learn from others will save you a lot of pain. Try it sometime.
YG, pickle apprentice

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(Not so) Dear Target Corp, I decided to stop by your store instead of where I usually shop because I needed very basic stuff and figured I would save a little money. I can not believe you carded me for canned air. The last time I was carded for anything was about 5 yrs ago at the grocery store for a bottle of wine. They at least have a sign that says if you look under 35, they will card. They were wrong, I was over 40 then! The cashier says she can not do an override. The "store manager" looks to be about the same age as my oldest kid and says it is corporate policy and there is no over ride available. Get real! This tells me corporate does not trust it's managers to hire people who are trustworthy and have at least 1/2 a brain to work register.

Oh, and it is very hard to find a corporate customer service number to call to complain. The "e-mail us" options are very limited and do not allow for any store experience comments. The last time I was mad at a company's lack of customer service, it took me over 10 yrs and a cross country move to step inside one of the stores again and I still only go there when a disabled relative asked me to get her something specifically from that store.

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Dear Katelynn,

I've had a lot of fun with you over the past week. I'm so happy you spent the whole day with me last Thursday.

I know you have invited yourself to hang out with me since then and we have let down our personal walls a little since our time together Thursday. I just don't know if you're interested in me in any other way besides friendship?

A lot of things we say and do personally and together seem to match up. I feel a calm and collected empowered happiness around you. Being around you just feels good. I don't know where we will go from here but I hope we continue into greatness. I want more greatness in my life...especially from someone I want to ask out. I feel as if we'd be good together and good for each other.

Thoughts?

Take care,
Josh

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Dear Josh,
Go mad with discretion. Proceed with caution.
Having said that, best of luck.
Love,
YG

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Dear You,

So to hear you tell it (and you do, to anyone who'll listen)--you've been everywhere, done everything, studied every subject and therefore know everything there is to to know about anything that comes up.

And yet you are still desperate for external validation, and anyone who doesn't supply your addiction is a big ol meanie.

Your life must be sad.

YG

 

 

 

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Dear Everything,

You've changed.

Sincerely,

db

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Dear Dharmablues,

I hear you. 

YG

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Dear yabbitgirl,

Any recommended coping strategies?

Sincerely,

db

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Think what you'd like to change that you can, and do that. After all, when the world or people around us change we're expected to roll with it, why not instigate a little change ourselves!

Also, conserve your happy time and place, whether it be a cuppa with a particular book (whom, moi?) or a hot bath, or simply lying in bed dreaming waking dreams. It's vital to take time for you in the face of a life reshuffle. Do things that are reaffirming for you. And if necessary, set your heels and flat-down say no to things that are not vital and disturb your peace. Taking a stand may be uncomfortable but sometimes it's absolutely necessary to remain who we are. Remember that by your very existence you have a right to be here.

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Dear Magic Thread,

Please inspire me to find the backing fabric Pat sent me a couple of years ago. I know it's here, I know I haven't used it and I don't want to spend more money on backing. It's bad enough I will need fabric to finish this ugly top. I've looked everywhere it should be, where I thought it was--only it isn't. I know I need 6 yards of fabric, please don't make it 10.

Thank you,

YG

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Dear iPhone,

Why don't you call me?  Is it because you are snug and cozy in the sneaky spot where I hid you from my children?  Are you having a really fun time with M's iTouch that I hid at the same time?  Are you angry that I forgot where I hid you?  Trust me, I've been looking EVERYWHERE.

Mr. AT&T is sending me bills that make me sad since I don't have you here to share them.

I am desperate to find you and even considering getting hypnotized to help me remember where you could be.  STOP HIDING!

XXOO

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Dear JKL.

Look in the one place where it/they couldn't possibly be, where you absolutely know they are not. Betcha anything you like they'll be there. Particularly if you are positive you've already looked there.

Ask me how I know this. (I found the fabric in just that place, this morning.)

 

Dear Thread,

Thanks!!

Love, 

YG

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Dear YG,

Loved Coriolanus! Features Jon Snow (great news reader).

Couldn't find the appropriate thread for this comment, though.

Sincerely,

DB

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Dear DB,

Glad you liked it! Nothing better than sharing a film with your friends.

Any film-related stuff you can put in "What DVD are you watching today?" Doesn't matter if you saw it in the cinema...we won't tell on ya!

Hugz,

YG, Shakespeare groupie extraordinaire

 

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