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TMI Challenge

So we always say that there is no such thing as TMI on vegweb.

I dare someone to come up with something that is, in fact, TMI for this forum.

My bets are on lubi or CK ftw.

The winner gets a box of prizes from KMK.  F'reals.
Extra points for humor and/or sex.

so i posted this on the vegan poo thread...but it was suggested to be posted here...
so this morning
after i pooed
and flushed
i checked the toilet( which i hope everyone does)
and there was a whole, dried cranberry from yesterday's salad floating in the water...
perhaps i should chew more?

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Oh, I have some school stories that will do well here.  I tell my kids, "OK, you don't have to tell me the details!" on a daily basis.  Duh.

"MISS, I gotta PEE!  My balls are about to bust!"

"Miss, at the school sleepover, this girl got her period all over the boys' bathroom."

"Miss, at the school sleepover, this kid had a boner--"

ENOUGH.  I DON'T WANNA KNOW.  TMI."

When I student taught, those situations played into my decision not to teach high school....but now, you wouldn't believe what i hear from my elementary kids,... :o

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this seems an appropriate place to post this....

So, Ive been malting(sp?) for some reason...and I mean pubes....and somehow they are ALL over my bedroom. I have no idea how. I really dont hang out naked THAT often now that I live with other people. It looks like I'm plucking them and throwing them on the floor or something. Emmmm...

Well. Im making holiday cards...they are all being assembled on my bedroom flood and...i just discovered I accidentally glued a pube to one...Now i have to inspect them all to make sure they are no other strays glued on to the cards "Happy Christmas! Here's a pubic hair! May the joy of the season be with you all year long!" :)>>>

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this seems an appropriate place to post this....

So, Ive been malting(sp?) for some reason...and I mean pubes....and somehow they are ALL over my bedroom. I have no idea how. I really dont hang out naked THAT often now that I live with other people. It looks like I'm plucking them and throwing them on the floor or something. Emmmm...

Well. Im making holiday cards...they are all being assembled on my bedroom flood and...i just discovered I accidentally glued a pube to one...Now i have to inspect them all to make sure they are no other strays glued on to the cards "Happy Christmas! Here's a pubic hair! May the joy of the season be with you all year long!" :)>>>

LOL

I hate all the odd places pubic hairs end up... underneath industrial-strength clear packing tape, stuck in a light-colored sweater I've already been wearing all day...

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this seems an appropriate place to post this....

So, Ive been malting(sp?) for some reason...and I mean pubes....and somehow they are ALL over my bedroom. I have no idea how. I really dont hang out naked THAT often now that I live with other people. It looks like I'm plucking them and throwing them on the floor or something. Emmmm...

Well. Im making holiday cards...they are all being assembled on my bedroom flood and...i just discovered I accidentally glued a pube to one...Now i have to inspect them all to make sure they are no other strays glued on to the cards "Happy Christmas! Here's a pubic hair! May the joy of the season be with you all year long!" :)>>>

:-D ;D

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Hehe. I kind of want a card from Z now.

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I have a birthday card from Z.

:o

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this seems an appropriate place to post this....

So, Ive been malting(sp?) for some reason...and I mean pubes....and somehow they are ALL over my bedroom. I have no idea how. I really dont hang out naked THAT often now that I live with other people. It looks like I'm plucking them and throwing them on the floor or something. Emmmm...

Well. Im making holiday cards...they are all being assembled on my bedroom flood and...i just discovered I accidentally glued a pube to one...Now i have to inspect them all to make sure they are no other strays glued on to the cards "Happy Christmas! Here's a pubic hair! May the joy of the season be with you all year long!" :)>>>

;D Maybe some of them were butthole hairs- they can be pube impostors. 

CW definitely gets the win for me, namely for the pictorial carrot evidence and the "plus" list:

plus: squiggly pen, hairbrush handle, fat plastic coat hanger, drumstick..... :hrmm:  the list goes on....

Squiggly pen!!!  :D  Although the plus list sounds a lot less satisfying than the produce.

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zealia, please report to my waxing room asap!!!

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zealia, please report to my waxing room asap!!!

I had a dream you waxed me.

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I had a dream you waxed me.

Does this need to go in the orgasm thread?

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Depends on if we have Masochists here.

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zealia, please report to my waxing room asap!!!

I had a dream you waxed me.

haha thats great
I hope I did a good job!

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zealia, please report to my waxing room asap!!!

I had a dream you waxed me.

haha thats great
I hope I did a good job!

I distinctly remember that it didn't hurt as much as I thought it should. Not that I've ever had it done, but, y'know.

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this seems an appropriate place to post this....

So, Ive been malting(sp?) for some reason...and I mean pubes....and somehow they are ALL over my bedroom. I have no idea how. I really dont hang out naked THAT often now that I live with other people. It looks like I'm plucking them and throwing them on the floor or something. Emmmm...

Well. Im making holiday cards...they are all being assembled on my bedroom flood and...i just discovered I accidentally glued a pube to one...Now i have to inspect them all to make sure they are no other strays glued on to the cards "Happy Christmas! Here's a pubic hair! May the joy of the season be with you all year long!" :)>>>

;D Maybe some of them were butthole hairs- they can be pube impostors. 

CW definitely gets the win for me, namely for the pictorial carrot evidence and the "plus" list:

plus: squiggly pen, hairbrush handle, fat plastic coat hanger, drumstick..... :hrmm:  the list goes on....

Squiggly pen!!!  :D  Although the plus list sounds a lot less satisfying than the produce.

in my book, butthole hairs = pubes. It's just a matter of nomenclature.

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wow- I don't know why I didn't see this thread earlier! I just read the whole hting & had to stop myself from laughing out loud several times!

My contribution:

About 2 years ago I ran a wintertime 5K with Dini. Even though I walked him to get him to poop before the race started, he had to poop again within the first half mile of the race. I had a baggie with me, so I scooped it up & kept running. The bag kept bouncing around so I had to keep changing the way I was carrying it. At some point I realized that there was a hole in the bag and I had poop on my hand, arm, and side of my leg. Great. After finishing the race I threw out the bag & wandered around asking everyone if they had any tissues or paper towels. Luckily, one of my friend's husband had wet nap thingys in the car so I could clean up enough to go home. I'm pretty sure that was the last 5K I did with Dini.

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I used a shampoo bottle once.......

a shampoo bottle and i dated all throughout highschool.

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I used a shampoo bottle once.......

a shampoo bottle and i dated all throughout highschool.

Ouch?

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I used a shampoo bottle once.......

a shampoo bottle and i dated all throughout highschool.

Ouch?

brittney learns new things about me everyday via vw!  it wasn't a big shampoo bottle.  it was just like a long tube shaped bottle.  dark purple. 

;)

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I have one...unfortunately. HA!  

Keri and I were on our very first date in Seattle at Seattle Center playing in the amusement park section.  I have very unpredictable periods sometimes.  I started my period and obviously didn't share the information with Keri.  I didn't have a tampon or a pad...I was kind of screwed.  So I went to the bathroom and stuffed a whole punch of toilet paper in my pants.

Even more bad news is the fact that I was wearing boxers, which is what I wear when it's not that time of the month.  So I couldn't really fashion a pad out of folded toilet paper the way all of us women have done with womens panties at some point in our lives.  

So anyway, Keri and I go about playing games and throwing darts and things when suddenly, the bloody wad of toilet paper came rolling down my leg and fell out on the ground right in front of everyone.  Fortunately Keri didn't see (my god, I don't know how).  But I bent over as quickly as I could and then shoved it in my pocket.  

I then started telling her I needed to use the bathroom (again) and she said we could go to the bathroom in a minute.  So I stood there bleeding all over myself hoping at this point that it wasn't like running down my leg and showing all over my pants.  Obviously it showing through my pants would have been a dead giveaway to Keri of what was going on.  What's even more disgusting is the fact that Keri tried to stick her hand in my pocket while we were walking.  I quickly grabbed her hand and prevented that from happening, but could you imagine had that actually happened?

I have never been so scared in all my life.  We were just getting to know each other and I was so afraid she was going to find out somehow.  I broke a cold sweat and my heart was pounding the rest of the day.

Talk about embarrassing for a first date.  It was even more embarrassing trying to hide my bloody clothes that night! Ouch!

But obviously things ended up working out okay...here we are almost 3 years later still together. Haha.

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